I guess I invite problems or something, but today I woke up with a migraine and couldn't go to write my commentaire de texte/midterm because I was throwing up. And then was sick all day. I finally made my way to the doctor at 4 to get a note, and the nurse basically wouldn't write me one. Or she did, but checked the "mild: can perform academic obligations but performance may be sub optimal" box. Which means I should basically have gone to my midterm. Thanks, nurse. I love you too. She also gave me a speech about migraine meds and it being my responsibility to be on them. I didn't even notice which box she had checked until I left, because my vision was blurry and I didn't read it. Ugh, anyway, feeling better. Still a little pounding in the back of the head, but tolerable.
I've been organizing this art thing, and it's been a disaster. Let's put it this way. The canvases were meant to be up sunday night, and they aren't up yet.
Aaaaaah.
I was supposed to go there this morning at 8am, and I slept through. I am such an idiot. I feel terrible. I also slept through a class, which sucks because I missed it LAST tuesday as well, to study. This needs to stop.,
A - Age of your first kiss: 14 B - Band you are listening to right now: I'm not. I'm watching MacGyver C - Crush: This second? Possibly the boyfriend, a little. Which is convenient. D - Dad's name: Richard E - Easiest person to talk to: Claire, or Davey, or Alex? F - Favourite ice cream: Vanilla G - Gummy worms or Gummy bears? Worms H - Hometown: Toronto I - Instruments: Guitar, Keyboard/Piano J - Junior High: TFS K - Kids: I don't happen to have any, no L - Longest car ride: Either to NB or Florida. Neither of which I was really old enough to remember M - Mom's name: Jan N – Nicknames: Cat, Cate, Kitten (from a select few) O - One wish: To be FAMOUS (not really) P – Phobia: That people hate me. Q - Quote: R - Reasons to smile: every time I walk home, I smile when I see the water. S – Scent: grapefruit T - Time you woke up today: 10:15ish U - Unknown fact about me: I would do almost anything for my friends W - Worst luck with: probably, like tay, boys. And I tend to make it worse than even bad luck could do. X - X-rays you've had: Teeth and stuff? Nothing big. Y - Years since you've been to church: Not since Vanny Channy took me in 2nd year. Z - Zodiac sign: Aquarius
QCAT (a.k.a. the queen's library catalogue) is the devil.
I could find NO BOOKS for what I needed. So I got frustrated, came home, and watched MacGyver. Which means I'm back to the library tomorrow at 8ish. Ugh.
I was talking to one of my favourite people in the world today, talking about going for a visit, and realized that there was no feasible way to do that without making it into a big production. He lives really far away, and there's no sense in my visiting if I'm going alone. That said, making it into a production is possible: there are other people that want to visit him, and they'd be more than willing to come if we can pick the right weekend.
But there's more to it than that. Me and this boy have a history. Not much of one, but enough that we're generally fairly conscious of it. And this, it seems, is a problem. I never thought it would be, really. Not with him. We've been friends for too long, and we're totally fine with each other. But there's other people to consider, I guess. And when I asked if my coming to visit would be awkward, it was implied that as welcome as I am, it might be. And I think my heart broke a tiny bit.
There's those few friends that you think you'll have forever, and my hope of that with this particular friend is sort of disappearing as I write this. It's too bad, really, because he's pretty wonderful. I'm sure we'll still hang out, in the future, but I feel like it's always going to have this element of being a production, and the days of us being bored and watching movies in my basement are gone. Thinking about it, they probably have been going that way for a while, but it's still sort of terrible to think about.
But hey, it proves that my theory about not dating your friends was spot on, right? Well in most cases, anyway.
Other than that, I'm completely exhausted, and it's making everything seem like a ton of work. Even thinking is getting to be beyond me. I've another test tomorrow (I am completely unsure about how I did on the tuesday midterm, by the way) and I need to do well on it. So I'm probably going to be up a while. Which sucks, because I have to bring the car to the dealer at 8am tomorrow. And I can't come home for a nap after class because I'm meeting roomie at QP at 6. Which is actually kind of awesome because I want/need/love autofry, and I can almost hear the mozza sticks in the back of my head crying "eat me, cat! eat me!",
I don't know when I started finding children creepy. I'm sitting on the couch chez the boy (who isn't here while I am in his living room, which I suppose is moderately strange but meh) and looking out the window. Children are walking by. Housemate of boyfriend walks downstairs:
me - are there always this many kids on your street? him - yeah, because the school is nearby. me - oh. Because they're creeping me out. I'm sitting here staring out the window and being creeped out by children.
The thing is, I am dead serious. Maybe it's because I don't see a lot of children in my day to day when I'm not working, or just that little kids having footraces down Aberdeen (the street where the curb is generally replete with broken glass and small bits of trash) seems innocuous, but I really was creeped out. And now that they're gone the clouds have pulled in front of the sun and everything got a little darker.
I have a midterm tomorrow, and I am absolutely positive I know nothing. It's for first year sociology, but I am not so bright and am a bad memorizer. I might be up all night.
Other than that, I saw cherry at the library earlier. Her readings are basically porn. I found this hilarious, and proceeded to share with the world of the library.
They were generally appreciative.
Cherry is awesome. The library is less awesome but pretty awesome regardless. Midterms are not awesome.
Who was it that was obsessed with social facts? Durkheim?,
I've basically been living here (at the library) for the past week, with the vague hope that I'll actually get something done. Meh. It's a fair assumption, and I am getting SOME things done, just really really slowly. Why is it so much easier to read than to write? I've read four books in the past two days, but my essay has progressed not at all. It's probably just because I didn't HAVE to read the books. I'm twisted like that. I'm writing an essay right now on characterization in Humphreys' [u]Wild Dogs[/u]. Basically about how the characters present themselves as being defined by their pets, but as the book progresses and the connection they have to their dogs becomes more tenuous and it becomes increasingly clear that it isn't the dogs (or the way in which said dogs went wild) that defines them, but rather the fact that they wait for them. Or something like that. I don't have a thesis really. I'm just making notes. It has been a shitty week. Thankfully it is over, and I'm hoping against hope that there isn't another one like it coming. Because I don't think I or le boyfriend could take it. I sort of treated him like crap this week, maybe a little. Ah well. I warned him beforehand at least. That's something, right? Now I just have to get things back to normal.
I'm going for tea at two. So I guess I should pack this up, make a few last notes, and be on my way. I'll be back, though. Seriously. It's inevitable. I have this to write, and a FIRST YEAR SOCIOLOGY WOO HOO test to study for, so I'd better be back.
It's actually funny. I tried a couple of the example questions for our test, and I knew nothing. Which freaked me out just enough to chain me to this table until about 7. Or until I can find someone who wants to rescue my from myself this evening. But that's AFTER tea. Oh tea. How I love your sweet wonder.,
The holidays are not so much days as piles of homework.
Tuesday, October 11, 2005
I didn't do enough homework this weekend. Which is a problem, because now I am a little swamped. But that's alright, as I seem to be on a sports team that doesn't really REQUIRE my going to practice (taken into consideration that I didn't go last week).
I am now at common ground, killing part of my day. Roomie is here somewhere too, but has temporarily disappeared. Which is bothersome as I would really like some tea but don't wnat to leave my bag. Oh well. I don't have class until one.
There is a painting I really like on the wall. If I had my palm pilot here I would take a wee picture of it, but as things are I'll just say it's abstract and really pretty.
I'm going to go to the gym after class today, after my last class, but that's going to require going home at 9:30 and going straight back to the gym, as I seem to have forgotten my gym bag. Maybe I'll be able to con someone into driving me home to grab it. Hmmm...,
I love hockey. I'm so glad it's back. We watched the game last night. It was... shut up. I know the sens won. Anyway, I have a test at 1pm. I have to study. I also have practice as soon as I finish class but I think whether I make it or not is going to depend on how fast I can study, because I'd have to be getting my gear together right now. So probably not making practice.
Also am leaving for toronto at 5:30. Goddamn it, I'm not going to practice, I'll just go lots next week. And go to the gym both days. Which I couldn't do this morning because I was going to have to do laundry so I could go to practice, and study while doing laundry.
In other news, I am getting new glasses tomorrow, hopefully. I have an eye doctor appointment at 2:30, and it's right next door to lenscrafters, and this could meean that I can finally stop wearing my glasses from level 2 that aren't really strong enough. I've had headaches all week. I'm excited, except for the fact that I have noone other than my mom to come help me pick frames. I really miss my old frames. I wish I could remember what make they were/hadn't lost them at the big apple the week before school started. Yeah. That second one is probably a pretty good call.
Study study study. Now. Does anyone know what year Cartier came? Or Champlain? I THINK 1534 and 160something, but I am afraid thinking is not good enough. Now go away. I have a lot of readings to redo.,
It's monday night, and I'm already frustrated. I've had ONE CLASS and this is how I feel. Thankfully after tomorrow I'm pretty much through the week. Or more than halfway through, anyway. I don't know. School makes me tired.,
Name: Cat Home: Edinburgh, United Kingdom About Me: Managed to graduate from Queen's, and am now in Teacher training at Edinburgh.
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